Friday, October 14, 2011
I get that alot...
"I don't know how you do it..."
I get that alot.
I am not sure what peoples perception of me is. I used to care. I'm not sure I do anymore. That being said, I am fairly certain my world considers me Wonder Woman. I used be fine, running around doing everything, planning everything...I used to be able to do all of that. Plus find time for me, and my kids, my hubby and my friends.
I don't know what changed. But I can't do it anymore.
Don't be impressed by me because I am barely holding it together. Those close to me may even argue that I am not holding it together. I just appear to be. I think those "appearances" can be so damaging. Not just to the person putting on the one-man-show, but to those that are watching. The perception that any one person has IT all together is exactly what creates the endless cycle of attempting perfection.
I guarantee you. Perfection is impossible.
Here's my reality.
I am a full time mom and wife who also happens to have a full time job outside of the home. I have 3 beautiful kids who I can't get enough of. For real. We don't get enough time together.
In order to maximize my time with family I:
1. Pay to have my house cleaned.
2. Pay to have my groceries delivered.
3. Pay to have someone watch my kids.
4. Pay to park. Pay to drive.
My cost is great. I don't mean the money. Change is coming. It has to. So many things are suffering while I run around like a crazy person trying to keep it all together. I may very well collapse before any changes are made...