My only purpose for blogging was to talk about weight loss, exercise and the emotional struggles and victories that go along with that. I have really loved blogging. I have met so many great people, heard so many great stories and been inspired myself.
For now - I am done. I don't feel inspired to blog about the week by week changes my pregnant body is going through. I do plan to finish my journey of weight loss and health, but for obvious reasons, this isn't my story right now.
I will keep reading the blogs that inspire me - and I pray for all of you frequently. Thank you so much for reading, and following and praying. Your continued prayers for a healthy pregnancy and baby are so appreciated.
Thank you for making blogging such an amazing journey....
PS. It wouldn't be fair of me to just bail on y'all - so I promise to update you on the important stuff - like gender and birthday. Once baby is born, maybe we can pick up where we left off.
I want you to know that I think about you all day long. Your very existence is a miracle that is quite simply beyond my comprehension. I hope that you don't mistake my shock. The knowledge of you changed my life forever. The preparation for you was life changing as well. You were created by a God who already knew your exact place in my life, on this earth and in history. He loves you more than I ever could. He has given me a prize - you. As unworthy as I think I am, I want you to know that I will try every day to be deserving of you.
Even as a surprise, you have captured our hearts and given us joy. We delight in learning how you change every day. We are anxious to find out who you are and who you will become.
I don't blog much anymore. I don't read many blogs anymore. It's not that I don't want to. I don't have much to say - and I don't read others because to be honest, I am sort of jealous of everyone achieving their weight loss goals. Please don't get me wrong...I am so thankful for this amazing miracle. It hasn't sunk in all the way yet - and so sometimes I struggle to read about people getting smaller, when I am in fact getting a little bit bigger every day.
On August 8th, my friend Deana commented that the jeans I was wearing were too big and I needed to be all done with them. On August 31, I had to unbutton those same jeans just to eat dinner. You know those first few month of being pregnant, when you feel kind of bloated and gross. You know you are getting bigger - but no one can tell you are pregnant yet? It's such a not cute stage. That's where I am at right now. I have to remind myself often, that I am growing a person, not getting fatter.
I am an emotional wreck. My poor family. I cry ALL THE TIME. On Sunday, I was crying because I didn't know which brand of ranch salad dressing I should choose. Thank God the store was practically empty! I didn't cry like this when I was pregnant with Isaac... (reason #1 that I think I am having a girl...) Here's what I do know for sure:
It's hard to be an emotional eater, when you are always emotional.
So frustrating! Pregnant or not pregnant - I believe this is true. The thing I need to remind myself is that I am actually still in charge. I might not be able to control what's growing inside of me - but I can control what I feed it. Today, I am going to try to take back my control.
I need prayer. I need support. I need a latte. Anyone else thrilled that Starbucks has brought back their Pumpkin Spice Latte??? Baby and I are!!!
I am 35 years old. I am married to my high school sweetheart, Chad. We started dating when we were 15, married at 19 and going on 16 years. We have three kids - Isaac (9) and Hope (6) and Gabriel (6 months).